He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize