I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
