where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize