you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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