SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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