Are we in a gay sports bar?
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
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