I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
You need a sexual gate keeper
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
