a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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