People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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