Kareoke will never be a sober sport
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Randomize
