Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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