Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
