I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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