Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize
