She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
