today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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