stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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