I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize