Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
