I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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