I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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