I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
