his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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