Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I party with great urgency now.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
