Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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