just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize