Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
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I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
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Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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