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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (217): View more from Illinois

  if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test

  (1-217): View more from Illinois

  wow, a mother in the making

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• (509): View more from Washington

  i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (916): View more from California

  That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt

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• (941): View more from Florida

  What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.

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• (626): View more from California

  I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.

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• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  How are you feeling?

  (435): View more from Utah

  I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  The power of my boobs compel you

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