she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
you win again, gameday.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?