Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
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