i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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