Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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