one word: firstdatebathroomanal
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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