I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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