If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Randomize
