We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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