Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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