i used baking grease as lip gloss
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize