Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
