They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
