Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
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