i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
