He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I pour the whiskey from now on
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize