he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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