Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
