Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
