I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'm just crazy horny about you
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
