If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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