She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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