Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
