We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
It's official drugs can't kill me
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
