i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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